Understanding the pressures that students face

School can be a place of discovery, where young people develop skills, explore their passions, and build lasting friendships. For many, it’s a space of growth and opportunity, but it can also bring challenges. Academic pressures, social expectations, developmental challenges, and looming transitions can all contribute to stress. A certain level of stress can be a healthy motivator, but too much can negatively impact mental health, self-esteem, and academic performance.

This article explores the common causes of school-related stress, how to recognise when it becomes a problem, and what parents, caregivers, and teachers can do to help. The article also explores the role of perfectionism, a factor that can intensify ordinary academic pressures into an unrelenting cycle of stress and self-criticism.

How common is school-related stress?

Australian data consistently shows that stress from school is one of the most pressing issues facing young people today:

These statistics highlight what parents and teachers often observe: school can be stressful, and without the right supports, this stress can tip into significant anxiety, avoidance, or even depression.

What causes school stress?

While every student’s experience is unique, some of the most common stressors include:

  • Grades and exams: The pressure to perform well can lead to performance anxiety, especially for students who want to complete university degrees that require high grades for entry.
  • Heavy workload: Students are often juggling many commitments, including multiple subjects, homework, part-time jobs, co-curricular activities, social events, and family expectations. Young people must adjust to being expected to do more and behave more independently than they have ever needed to before.
  • Friendship and peer issues: Social conflict, bullying, and the need to “fit in” are all common concerns in youth. Adolescence is a developmental period where young people are learning more about who they are as an individual, generally focussing more on their identity in peer relationships than in family relationships, and this can bring a lot of uncertainty and anxiety.
  • Transitions: Moving into high school or planning for life after graduation is a big change, and for students who are uncertain about exactly what they want to do with their life and career, finishing school can feel like jumping into the unknown.

While each of these factors can be stressful, one pattern often makes them worse: the pressure to perform. This is where perfectionism comes into the picture.

When pressure to perform becomes perfectionism

Many students want to do well in school, and some must strive for high grades to receive a competitive ATAR for entry to their preferred university pathway. But for some students, the drive for excellence can become perfectionism: an unhealthy cycle in which anything less than perfect equals failure.

Signs of perfectionism may include:

  • Unrealistically high expectations for grades or the overall quality of their assignments and exams.
  • Procrastination, which often comes from having standards so high that it feels too overwhelming to even start. Some students would prefer not to work on things at all if they can’t do them perfectly from the outset.
  • Distress over minor mistakes or receiving a grade below what the student expects of themselves (e.g., they might expect “straight As” and be very upset if they receive anything else).
  • Excessive checking, re-writing, or revising work long after it’s good enough.
  • Having lengthy to-do lists and spending more time on preparing these than actually completing schoolwork.
  • Harsh self-criticism and low self-esteem, even when performing well.
  • Avoiding handing in work or skipping exams for fear of failure.

Perfectionism can impact wellbeing, increase a young person’s risk of anxiety and depression, and contribute to school refusal if they feel they can’t meet expectations.

Let’s imagine that Student A and Student B are two students in the same class, preparing to take the same exam. Student A does not experience challenges with perfectionism, while Student B does. Here’s how they might behave:

  • Student A feels nervous, but revises steadily, sits the exam, takes their results as feedback for next time, and accepts that they tried their best.
  • Student B sets impossible standards, cancels other plans to make more time to study, studies late into the night whilst sacrificing sleep, panics before and during the exam, and interprets mistakes or less-than-perfect grades as a personal failure.

Even if both students perform well, Student B is more likely to feel exhausted, self-critical, isolated, and demotivated. Over time, this cycle can make school-related stress chronic and difficult to manage without help.

How parents and teachers can help

While a perfectionistic mindset can be difficult to shift, the right support can make a big difference. Helpful strategies include:

  • Normalising imperfection: Share stories of mistakes that became learning opportunities in your own life.
  • Reframing success: Praise persistence, learning new skills or improving existing skills, and an attitude of curiosity – not just grades.
  • Encouraging balance: Support interests outside of school to build a more robust sense of self-esteem and confidence. Self-esteem is much less vulnerable when it is based on more than one area of life.
  • Promoting healthy routines: Ensure rest, downtime, a healthy diet, social connection, and consistent and adequate sleep.
  • Challenging avoidance: Gentle encouragement to face the fear (e.g., attending class, handing in work, or starting on an assignment) can help challenge unhelpful thoughts about the worst-case outcomes.
  • Modelling healthy coping: Demonstrate healthy ways of managing your own stress and mistakes without self-criticising.
  • Seeking support early: If stress becomes severe, persistent, or results in academic problems (e.g., school refusal or dropping grades), reach out to a GP or psychologist.

When to seek professional help

If a student’s stress from school is persistent, worsening, or interfering with daily life, it’s time to seek help. Warning signs can include:

  • Repeated school absences, avoidance, or refusal.
  • Severe anxiety before tests or presentations.
  • Declining grades due to procrastination.
  • Physical symptoms (e.g., frequent headaches, stomach aches, or sleep disruption).
  • Frequent, harsh self-criticism.
  • Expressions of hopelessness or self-harm thoughts.

In these situations, a GP can assist with a Mental Health Treatment Plan, which provides Medicare rebates for psychology sessions.

Therapies that can help

Psychologists use evidence-based therapies to support young people with school stress and perfectionism, including the following specific therapies:

1. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) is the most commonly used and evidence-backed treatment for anxiety in young people. It is also the only therapy with strong evidence showing it can address perfectionism. It helps students:

  • Challenge unhelpful thoughts such as, if I’m not top of my class, I’m a failure.
  • Learn coping strategies for exam and performance anxiety.
  • Use graded exposure to face avoided tasks (e.g., gradually re-engaging with school after absence).
  • Rebalance workloads and perfectionistic standards.

2. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) teaches young people to notice perfectionistic thoughts and difficult emotions without being ruled by them. By focusing on values (e.g., learning, curiosity, and friendship) rather than grades, ACT encourages students to thrive even in the presence of anxiety.

3. Dialectical Behaviour Therapy

For students whose school stress triggers big emotions or crisis behaviours, Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) teaches skills that build resilience in emotional regulation, mindfulness, distress tolerance, and communication.

4. Family and school collaboration

Addressing perfectionism and stress works best when schools and families are involved. If appropriate, psychologists will often work with parents and schools to create consistent routines, realistic expectations, and practical adjustments like flexible deadlines or check-ins with a trusted teacher.

In summary

School-related stress is common, but it doesn’t have to define a young person’s educational experience. Grades, workloads, friendships, and the transitions that accompany this stage of life all play a role in stress, but perfectionism is often the hidden factor that intensifies it and keeps students stuck in a cycle of self-criticism and fear of failure.

By recognising the signs of perfectionism, supporting healthy coping strategies, and seeking professional help when needed, parents and teachers can make a real difference.

At Solasta, we help young people who are experiencing challenges with school-related stress and perfectionism. Taking the first step is simple: Request an appointment with one of our psychologists and help your child build resilience, confidence, and improve their wellbeing.

About the author

Madelaine de Valle, Clinical Psychologist

Madelaine de Valle is a Clinical Psychologist who works with adults and young people aged 16 and over. Her approach incorporates humour and collaborative discovery, empowering individuals to develop resilience against future challenges.

With an interest in addressing concerns such as anxiety, perfectionism, body image, emotion regulation, stress, and self-esteem, Madelaine employs a range of evidence-based therapeutic modalities, including Cognitive Behaviour Therapy, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, and Dialectical Behaviour Therapy. As a scientist-practitioner, Madelaine holds a PhD in Clinical Psychology.

She maintains both research and clinical roles, enabling her to stay up to date on the latest psychological evidence. Her research focusses on areas such as perfectionism, body image, and eating disorders, whilst Madelaine’s clinical background has included roles in both public and private sectors, facilitating both individual and group therapy.